Can I please just blog?

Today I was wondering, why on Earth is it so difficult to sit in front of the computer and blog?! I am passionate about my writing, I have absolutely no friends to hang out with (my closest friend lives in a completely different time zone), I have a good computer and plenty to complain about.

So what is it? What stops me?

I can come up with a thousand reasons, but the fact of the matter is, I just don't.

My Turkey went out last night, his friend is visiting and I'm so jealous I can't even think straight. But, if I really think about it... his friend hasn't visited us since we moved to this side of the Country, and he only came to visit us once when we were on the other side. We see my friend at the other side of the World a lot more often than we see him. So why am I so jealous?

Again, I can come up with a thousand reasons, but the fact of the matter is, I just am.

I'm starting to spot a trend. I seem to do (or not do) all these things and feel all these emotions without ever really understanding why, so then, a few months down the road, I do something or say something stupid that then makes me do, or feel even worse. And I never do anything about it.

Do I complain too much? Absolutely! I know I do!

I've been sending messages to every friend I can think of, trying to schedule skype calls, and it feels like I'm a debt collector chasing payees. Nobody picks up, nobody replies, nobody really cares!

Am I surprised? Not one bit. Does it hurt? Every time. I feel that there is nothing I can do about it. I can't create a life that has other people in it because I am let down every single time. Why bother?

Facebook. The enemy. I see people's lives, how full they are, how full of love and joy. I see my facebook page, it's all complaining about this that or the other. No real life. But obviously nobody is going to put on the social page how miserable they may really be! Of course not! They are going to put things there that they want other people to see, so they can show how wonderful their lives are.

It's so medieval it's funny when you truly think abou it. Everybody gets to be a courtier. Everybody gets to show off how powerful they are, and if you are not in that circle, you are a peasant with holes in your shoes and rotten teeth.

I'm a peasant with rotten teeth.

Last Week in Vancouver

This is it. Just a few more days.

As we were approaching the runway at YVR at the end of October 2012, the sun was shining, the mountains were in full view, snow covered the tips and my heart beat with excitement. I was so giddy. I couldn't wait to get home.

That day, we had many errands to run, from booking the internet/phone connection, to sorting out the fireplace issues at our property which is currently let, we stayed awake for over 48 hours. But I was so glad and excited to be home that I didn't notice, I was numb with joy.

I had the biggest lunch of Spicy Tuna Sashimi at the McSushi close to my mom's apartment. This was the best day ever.

The next day, we woke up got ready grabbed a cab, rode the sea bus and then the sky train straight back to YVR. But I wasn't worried, in a little over 2 weeks I would be back again. I had many many days ahead that I would take advantage of everything!

I saw people, I ate sushi, I watched movies, I drank wine, I even had jagger bombs!

It was so amazing to get to have a bit of balance in life, my husband and I started working 10-14 hours 7 days a week but we also began going out more. We danced and we laughed!

My Turk had the most fun he as ever had at a New Year's party. He was like the young man I never had the chance to meet and I loved every bit of it.

I always give him a hard time because he always acts like a 10 year old and that make me feel like a mom. But I'm glad he does. I'm glad he is crazy, fun and so silly! He's the perfect Ying to my Yang!

But now... just a week to go, it is all sinking in. The apartment is still the mess we found when we first walked in and hated the idea of having to stay here. The kitchen is not finished as I wanted. I didn't see everyone I wanted to see. I didn't watch as many movies as I would have wanted to and I certainly did not eat as much sushi as I could have.

What happened?

The new baby was born. I introduce to you, Zacely Limited. Our very own brain child!