Thursday, July 5, 2012

The Ultimate Posh Snack: Red Caviar Crisps

Thank you democracy. Thank you for taking down Communist Russia. Hurray for free market and the flourish of capitalism.

Thank you Russia for giving us Red-Caviar flavoured crisps!

The roots of my crispy past:

My mom used to keep crisps well out of my sister's and my reach. She used to hide them from us. But one day, I found out she not only loved them, she has been secretly addicted to them her whole life. I still remember the day I found her out. I was snooping through her drawers, as I loved to do when I was younger. I was always mesmerized by certain things, the fact that there were no photos of her and my dad's wedding, the silk scarfs carefully folded in her bottom drawer, which she never wore. The bag with a few gold coins well hidden in between clothes. I loved going through her underwear, bras were things that always caught my eye. She was never the one to have pretty underwear. Playtex cotton was her thing, still is. The cones from the bra would make me laugh and wonder what I would be like when I had children, of course I was going to have four, so I would probably have really large breasts. And then, one day, on her bed side bureau, on the bottom drawer, I pulled an old pyjama top and I found what I never thought I would find there: a half eaten bag of Fritos.

My first reaction, was shock, my second one: eat as many as I could without her noticing! Of course, I was even cheekier than that, what would she say to me "you know those hidden crisps? did you eat them?" She couldn't! Because if it had been my sister, then I would find out she kept hidden crisps! I had her. And it was great. Of course, since then it became a mission to sneak into her room and steal crisps whenever possible! (I should've been stealing the gold coins right?!) To this day, we have never spoken about the subject.

You can see then, how Crisps were romanticized and would for the rest of my life be the forbidden food I must not touch.

That is of course until I met my husband.

My husband's influence on my diet:


My husband is a crisp monster. A troll even. I had never met anyone in my life before him who ate as many crisps as he does, and as quickly. Ten at a time in a single mouthful are the norm. Lucky him to have a slender frame otherwise... I don't know... But life as unfair as it is did not give me the same build and of course crisps should have remained the taboo food that they were for most of my life. Until recently, crisps became a staple food in our household. And we can't share. We have to divide the bag equally between us. Nobody can share with my husband. He eats ten in a single bite. I eat one. I suck the flavour before eating the crisp until my tongue is numb. By the time I have five the bag is done. We have a divided snack plate, he sticks to his half. I stick to mine. That is until now... crisps are no longer a staple. I want to live very very long and enjoy them without worrying about a heart attack!

Our love combined

My love for exotic food blended with his love for crisps multiplied by our shared joy of travel = our mission: to try every flavour, every brand everywhere in the World!

The Countries are many the time and stomach too little. But we have been giving it our best for the past 3 years. We have tried everything from sour plum flavoured crisps in Taiwan to the classic sour cream and onion flavour which seems to be mostly everywhere. My husband sticks only to the vegetarian flavours whilst I try everything and anything, though earthy flavours such as ribs, mushrooms, ham, etc. never prove to be my favourites.

Findings